It's DetaclipmoC
by StephanoRainbow
Summary: This was voted the most random story by my friends. They also think it's really good. It's the story behind James Baxter. And wds is in the story too. Without wds, the story would be way less random, but whatever.


"Hello! AiboneZ si eman yM."

"...What?"

"Huh?"

"Excuse me?"

"I don't speak Spanish."

"Are you talkin' weirdly to me?! A-Are you yoloing? Huh? Speak english, woman!" *sigh* gniyrt peek RetteB.

Chapter 1

James Baxter, age 20, is the smartest nerd in the world. He knows how to make someone smile because he is that smart. James is happy. James has friends, family, and a girlfriend. James has thick black hair, square glasses, and looked like an anime character, except his eyes...were different. His eyes...were purple. Imagine seeing a guy with purple eyes. Everyone always freaks out of James' purple eyes and of course, everyone gets sad and mad, even James. James hates his purple eyes, but his girlfriend, Beth, always cheers him up. Beth says that James' eyes are purple because of the lighting. Beth's theory is wrong, but logic cheers James up. Beth has short brown hair, brown eyes, freckles, and dimples. Beth is like the perfect girl. So, when you think about it, James and Beth are perfect for each other. Now you're probably saying that nobody's 'perfect', but you're wrong in this book. I know, I'm as mad as you. You're probably protesting by now, but hear me out. Beth is obviously not perfect(you'll see why soon), but James is. Why? Well...you should listen to James' side of the story.

Chapter 2

I woke up, my girlfriend, Beth, next to me. I got up and had a cup of coffee and some cereal. While I had my breakfast, waiting for Beth to wake up, I was reading the newspaper. The newspaper was rather odd today. The newspaper said that a girl was speaking a really odd language. A language that no one has ever spoke before. She kept saying 'Semaj' all night long until the sun rose. After the sunrise, the girl vanished. That article doesn't have a lot of logic in it. Maybe the people who made the article made a mistake. I need to talk to the boss of "The Colorado Times". Not enough logic is terrible for kids. I walked rather fast up stairs to Beth.

"Beth, Beth! Wake up!" Beth slowly woke up.

"What is it James?" Beth said tiredly.

"There's not enough logic in this article! The article is bad for children!" Beth grabbed the newspaper from my hand and red the article. When she was done reading, she yawned and said

"You're right*yawn*...there isn't enough logic in this article."

"Can I complain to the boss then?"

"As long as you're not too harsh on him or her. Don't be too...grumpy..." Beth fell asleep as I rushed to my car and drove to the building that started this monstrous paragraph. I rushed into the building and walked fast to the boss' office.

"Your article doesn't have logic;that's terrible for children!" I yelled. The boss turned around and said

"It makes complete sense! It's just complicated!"

"How can an article be complicated when I'm one of the smartest guys on earth?!" I said while I clenched my teeth. The boss mumbled to himself for a bit. He mumbled so quietly...I couldn't hear a single word he said. After he was done mumbling, he looked back up at me and said

"Read the article again." I stared at him angrily. I decided to indeed read the newspaper again. The boss gave me today's newspaper as I read the article again.

'A crazy girl (who most people think was drunk) ran into the night and vanished. Nobody knew who she was.' What? That's not what I read.

"But…what about the Semaj part?"

"What? What is even Semaj?!" I didn't say anything. How the heck did I come up with an odd word like Semaj. Did my imagination do that? I don't know. Well, I said I was sorry to the boss for running into his office and screaming. I drove home and saw Beth eating her breakfast, reading the newspaper.

"Oh, hi James. I just realized that there is nothing wrong with this article. When I was sleepy all I read was some munchkins dancing on dogs' back. Now that I'm awake, I can actually read reality, and it turns out there is logic in this article."

"I know…"

"I hope you didn't get into a giant fit with the boss…" Beth talked about me and the boss, but I wasn't listening to her. I was thinking about me. Am I going bananas? I also realized that the boss is the first person that I met and didn't freak out about my purple eyes. Who is that boss? This nonsense surely can not be because of my genius mind. The boss must be behind this...but...how?

Chapter 3

"Beth, I need to see the boss again." I interrupted. Before Beth could say anything, I was out the door. I went back to "The Colorado Times" company and asked to see the boss.

"I'm sorry, but our boss is out of town;and your eyes are...um, creative." The woman behind the counter said.

"But, I just saw him."

"Our boss is a woman, if you must know."

"D-Don't you have a replacement boss while the real boss is out of town?"

"We couldn't find anybody to take the job, so we're bossless for now." What...the...heck.

"Th-Then who did I scream at?"

"You screamed at someone here?!"

"I thought he was the boss. I had a concern." I said while I was embarrassed. The woman showed me all the men that worked in their company and none of them looked like the guy I talked to. I looked around the building;just to make sure I went to the right place, and I did. I'm so confused. This has no logic. The boss must've been my imagination. But why is my imagination acting up now? I didn't have any imagination until now. Maybe I need to be in an insane asylum. To make my friends, family, and Beth safe. I went back home and saw Beth doing her morning exercises. Or maybe Beth could cheer me up. She always does.

"Hey, Beth. I'm back home."

"So, what did you say to the boss?" Beth asked while doing a spin.

"Beth...sweety...I think I'm crazy." Beth stopped her exercises montage and sat down with me.

"Oh, honey, you're not crazy. You're one of the smartest guys in the world and we have a trophy to prove it." I really did win a trophy for being one of the world's smartest person. That's true that I'm smart, but is my imagination taking me over? I told Beth everything that happened from this morning to now. Beth listened;not saying a word. In the end, Beth said

"Okay...maybe your imagination IS taking over you. Do you want your imagination to be gone for good?"

"Yes! This imagination thing is driving me crazy!"

"Then...maybe we could do a brain surgery. Like the kind when doctors cut a piece of your brain out. Of course...that's a disturbing idea, but-"

"Yes, that's a really good idea! We'll get a piece of my brain out and I can say goodbye to imagination."

"But, honey, imagination's not that bad;and we might not have enough money to even cut out a piece of your brain;and what if you die?!"

"What would you rather be: smart or crazy?" Beth didn't say anything. She just looked like this :/

"Well...I don't want to take this chance…tell you what, if you see something really weird one more time, then we can do the surgery." I hope I don't get crazy again. Beth seems really upset about the surgery. I even saw her crying on the kitchen table this evening. Beth said that I'm her only family left. Everyone else in her family is gone. Well, that night, when I went to bed, I dreamed of a girl. The girl wasn't Beth. The girl had long black hair, had mummy like strips on her face, arms, and...wings, and she had purple eyes...just like me.

"Semaj! Uoy taht sI?!" I had no clue what she was saying. She was saying a language I actually don't understand(I know all the languages in the world...except this one). The only thing she said that I understood was: code. Code...code...is her language a code? Hmm…well, I woke up and saw Beth already eating breakfast.

"Did you have a weird dream?" Beth asked sadly.

"Actually, no, I didn't! I think I'm winning from my imagination!" Beth was very happy to hear that. The reason why I said I didn't have a weird dream was because I don't want Beth to be unhappy. Besides, that girl in my dream...I think I can get used to her. She has purple eyes...just like me. I suddenly feel normal. I like that. :)

Chapter 4

Now, that's not the happy ending right there. There's more. James still dreams about the weird girl, even if he liked it, and Beth wasn't sad any more. She thought the surgery was completely gone from James' head...but, it's not. One night, James dreamt about that girl. But this night, James found out that the girl was talking backwards. So he did too.

"Ih!...RetxaB SemaJ si eman yM. Srouy s'tahW?"

"Finally! I found you, James Baxter. I've been looking all over for you." The girl said. James was shocked that the girl's language changed in a snap. James couldn't say a word,

"Well, now that you figured out my code, IT'S TIME." and James woke up. James was very confused. "It's time"? What does that mean?! I guess we'll find out now.

Chapter 5

Beth and I were in the car. Beth was driving as I was thinking about the girl talking about time. What's it time for? Is it somebody's event but I forgot? I don't know…

"Hey, are you alright, James?" Beth asked at the stop sign. I think Beth saw my nervous face.

"I-I'm okay."

"Are you sure?...James, just because you want me to be happy, that doesn't mean you should hide your damages. There is always sad and mad feelings in life...even if you're the smartest person in the world. Everyone fails...and it's okay." That short paragraph that Beth said made me feel comfortable to say what was happening.

"I'm dreaming of a girl. A girl with long black hair and purple eyes. She was saying something I couldn't understand. I then found out she's saying a code. So I said something in the code and she said it's time. But...I don't know what's going to happen." Beth frowned a little as she turned the car the other way around.

"Beth, why are we going right? Home is left."

"I know." That's all Beth said. We didn't say a word to each other until Beth parked the car at the hospital.

"Beth, I don't want to do this anymore…" Beth still didn't say anything as she got out of the car and locked the doors behind her. So the surgery's really happening. I guess I'll have to say goodbye to the girl in my dreams. And...if the surgery fails...I guess I'll need to do something for Beth. That night, I, of course, saw the girl.

"I guess this is goodbye." I said.

"Goodbye? xD" the girl laughed so hard as it was awkward for me. When the girl stopped laughing, she said

"James*giggles*This is only the beginning."

"So...I'll see you again?"

"Mmm-hmm*chuckles*"

"When? How? Does the surgery fails?!"

"Of course not! My husband will do the surgery. Don't worry, he's a professional doctor."

"Well...before this is the logical goodbye...what's your name?"

"Oh, my name is Zenobia, little brother."

"Little brother?" I woke up all of a sudden. Man, if I'm going to see Zenobia again, then I will only visit for a short amount of time. That girl has zero logic, and zero logic=one crazy guy.

Chapter 6

On the day of the surgery, Beth was driving me to the hospital;not saying a word and having a straight face.

"Beth...if I don't make it….will you marry me?" I got the box and ring out as Beth actually had emotion on her face. A tear ran down her face as she said

"Yes." I slipped the ring on her finger as I said

"If the surgery fails, I want you to keep this ring, even if you're married to someone else. This ring will let you never forget about me and that I love you." Beth stopped the car and hugged me as she said

"I'll never forget you." Another tear ran down Beth's face as Beth smiled. When I was on the table, ready for the surgery, a man that's in his 20s came into the room, dancing and saying

"Work it, work it, work it, work it-oh! Sorry I didn't see you there. is in the...um, in the house?" Right when I saw his face I had a bad feeling about this. Zenobia's husband is silly...and that's bad for doing a surgery. So, injected a needle filled with green...stuff…

Chapter 7

The surgery was a success!-no, actually...it failed. I just wanted you to be happy for a bit. Yes, James Baxter passed away in the surgery. was too silly...especially when he slapped James in the face for no reason…( thought he was high-fiving James :/). Anyway, even when our main character died, that story is still not over. James woke up and saw Zenobia before him...flying in the sky with her wings(even if one was broken). James looked around. It looked like he was stuck inside a giant white cube.

Chapter 8

"Wh-Where am I, Zenobia?"

"You're in my place;my home. So, as you can see, is a professional doctor."

"Really?! But he's so silly and why am I still seeing you?"

" killed you. did his job. You passed away and now hanging out with me, little brother." I didn't know what to say. Beth...is all alone...and ...was supposed to fail the surgery...just so I can hang out with the one who started this all!

"WHERE IS THE FRICK IS BETH!?" I shouted.

"Suicided herself. Without you, she couldn't live on." I just wanted to punch and destroy Zenobia. Instead, I started thinking logic to calm myself. I'm not dead, I'm just hallucinating, and Zenobia is probably just trying to mess with me about Beth. There's one question that doesn't make sense.

"Why do you call me little brother?"

"You are my little brother. We were both born by Zach and Crystal Baxter."

"But I don't have wings."

"Yeah...I don't know what to say about that...you'll have to ask mom and dad." I had enough of Zenobia. I want to make her miserable. So if Zenobia wants to hang out with me all my life, then I won't. I sat in a corner, facing the opposite direction from Zenobia. About an hour and a half later of not talking, Zenobia said

"Sorry if you don't like this...but all I wanted to do was see my little brother." I still didn't say anything, and I'm not believing anything she's saying. Sure I never knew my parents, but there's no logic.

"I've been looking for a long time for you. Five other random guys were before you;in the same spot you're sitting in. They were all furious at me. I kidnapped guys just to see if any of them were you...but they weren't. But now I found you!"

"How do you know that I'M your little brother!?" I yelled.

"You solved my code, and you're speaking backwards now."

"Ton M'i oN!" I put my hands over my mouth when I said that. I really am speaking backwards.

"Why*puts hands over mouth;then takes them off*am I talking english now, though?!"

"You're used to backwards;and once you get used to backwards, it sounds english to you. Like now, I'm talking backwards, but it sounds english to both of us." That actually makes sense...a little bit. We didn't say a word until I started thinking about .

"Why did you marry a silly, lazy, idiot?" I asked in the "nicest" way possible.

"To be honest, he's not my husband. But, makes me laugh so I call him my 'husband'." I don't understand how is funny. It's not like he has a youtube channel(side note: he does in reality). Anyway, if Zenobia is an angel, that means she knows what's going on on planet earth.

"When's the surgery going to be over?" I asked, actually looking at her odd face, like mine.

"I already told you. Your surgery is over and you passed away."

"I don't believe you." Zenobia touched the air three times in a triangle. Then, a screen appeared and it showed and me lying on the counter. had a laser...lost hold of it, so it was going everywhere.

"AHHHH!*pushes buttons to stop laser;makes drill dance*Drill, did I tell you to dance? No, I did not!" I saw my bloody death, caused by a fake doctor. I then saw talking to Beth.

"How is he?" Beth asked.

"Um….*banana "rings"*Miranda! Stop calling me!" walked away as Beth looked worried. She ran to the nurse as she told her that the surgery failed. I saw Beth being devastated...until...she really did suicide herself. A tear ran down my face until I remembered that Zenobia was messing with me.

"SHOW ME THE FRICKIN' TRUTH!" I yelled.

"This is the frickin' truth! Look for yourself!" So, I did, too, poke the air in a triangle shape pattern as I saw the same thing Zenobia showed me. So...so it's real. I died...Beth died...tears furiously ran down my face as I cried

"WHERE THE FRICK IS BETH?!" Zenobia made a circle out of her hands as a bubble of Beth appeared. Beth was, what looked like, nowhere. Beth looked lost.

"Well, where is she?!" I cried again.

"Beth is where we call, The Lost People. The Lost People is a place where people killed themselves for no reasons...they didn't know what life was."

"I want to see Beth, person to person!" I said. Zenobia popped the bubble as Beth was right before me.

"Beth?"

"James?!" We ran to each other a hugged.

Chapter 9

"Wh-where are we?!"

"We died and we're with the monster;Zenobia." I "nicely" introduced Zenobia to Beth.

"Oh, so this is the girl you've been dreaming about...she does look like you. You guys could be brother and sister."

"A monster can not be my sister." I said angrily.

"Well...Zenobia just wants to be your sister."

"Zenobia! Did you brainwash Beth?!" Zenobia shook her head as she was crying for all the mean things I said.

"You don't believe your own sister! I'm telling mom and dad!" Zenobia cried as she got a banana and two adults, around in their 50s, appeared. The man had wings, purple eyes, and gray hair. The woman had no wings, purple eyes, and had long gray hair.

"James? Is that you?!" The woman said.

"James?! I thought he was dead." The man said.

"No, dad. I found James Baxter. He's your son and my brother!" The woman picked me up and looked at me head to toe.

"Well...he certainly does look like our son."

"Yes...but why doesn't he have wings?"

"I don't know dad." All the big giants looked at me, waiting to say something.

"I want to get out of here!" I cried.

"...I don't think this is our son.." The woman said.

"No, mom! His name is James Baxter!"

"Hmm...no. Change him into a horse."

"What?!" We all said.

"Yes. As punishment for pretending to be my son, you will be a horse, and your job will to try to make people happy!" And from that day, James Baxter was just an amazing horse that made people happy. No one knew about his life...all anyone heard him say was James Baxter. Beth was very upset without James and eventually moved into the underworld. Poor James Baxter. He does things for us...but no one does things for him.(if you want to know more about James, look up his first and last name).

The End

Based on a real character in Adventure Time


End file.
